Bonds

 

          Anyone who is thinking about marriage or is married, knows it is not a simple decision. It is an important decision that will forever create a bond with your husband or wife. Mark 10:6-8, But from the beginning of creation God made them male and female. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one flesh. God instituted marriage as a blessing and was given to make our lives happier, fuller, spirit stronger and a helper (Genesis 2:18). God knew our physical desires and lack of self-control as mentioned by Paul in 1 Corinthians 7:8-9, “I say to the unmarried and to widows: It is good for them if they remain as I am. But if they do not have self-control, they should marry, since it is better to marry than to burn with desire.” Not everyone is built for a life of celibacy and God knows a spouse will be a blessing.  

Genesis 2:21-24, So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to come over the man and he slept. God took one of his ribs and closed the flesh at that place. Then the Lord God made the rib he had taken from the man into a woman and brought her to the man. And the man said: This one, at last is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh; this one will be called “woman,” for she was taken from man. This is why a man leaves his father and mother and bonds with his wife, and they become one flesh. That bond that God created in marriage can never be broken. The same way Jesus Christ is the groom and we the Church are his bride. Marriage is a life-long commitment and should be enjoyed. Ecclesiastes 9:9, Enjoy life with the wife you love all the days of your fleeting life, which has been given to you under the sun, all your fleeting days. For that is your portion in life and in your struggle under the sun.  

Genesis 1:27-28, So God created man in his own image; he created him in the image of God; he created them male and female. God blessed them and God said to them, “Be fruitful, multiply, fill the earth and subdue it. Rule the fish of the sea, birds of the sky and every creature that crawls on the earth. God knew Satan would pervert his commandments and his image to the world in rebellion. There is a reason why the Bible mentions male and female. We are created in God’s image, every last one of us. We are either male or female when we are born. Do you see how with science/medicine and public opinion/social media, Satan has perverted the image of God in us? Surgeries can be done for men to turn into woman and vice versa. Transgender is a person who identifies themselves as the opposite of their birth sex. The idea of male and female as the only two sexes has completely been destroyed by the world. Same sex marriage is now legal. God does not care about the laws of this land but when it comes to his commandments there is no exception.  

God’s commandments and his word will never change or conform for the approval of the world. Hebrews 13:8, Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and forever. Homosexuality is a sin, a pagan tradition and unholy. Leviticus 18:22, You are not to sleep with a man as with a woman; it is detestable. Leviticus 20:13, If a man sleeps with a man as with a woman, they have both committed a detestable act. I Corinthians 6:9-10, Don’t you know that the unrighteous will not inherit God’s kingdom? Do not be deceived: No sexually immoral people, idolaters, adulterers or males who have sex with males, no thieves, greedy people, drunkards, verbally abusive people or swindlers will inherits God’s kingdom. I Timothy 1:8-11, But we know that the law is good, provided one uses it legitimately. We know that the law is not meant for a righteous person, but for the lawless and rebellious, for the ungodly and sinful, for the unholy and irreverent, for those who kill their fathers and mothers, for murders, for the sexually immoral and homosexuals, for slave traders, liars, perjuries and for whatever else is contrary to the sound teaching that conforms to the gospel concerning the glory of the blessed God, which was entrusted to me. The punishment is the same for all those who practice this sin and it is an act of rebellion towards God. We know the punishment is the lake of fire. Jude 1:7-8, Likewise, Sodom and Gomorrah and the surrounding towns committed sexual immorality and perversions and serve as an example by undergoing the punishment of eternal fire. In the same way these people – relying on their dreams – defile their flesh, reject authority and slander glorious ones. PBS (Public Broadcasting Service) now has a show where Drag Queens (men who dress like woman) are reading books to your children. If you don’t think Satan isn’t trying to corrupt your children’s mind at an early age, you may be blinded by him yourself. All who sin will fall short and spend eternity in hell.  

Fornication is sexual intercourse between people not married to each other and has become popular in American culture. Children growing in this country are not realizing the importance of their purity. I Corinthians 6:15-20, Don’t you know that your bodies are a part of Christ’s body? So should I take a part of Christ’s body and make it part of a prostitute. Absolutely not! Don’t you know that anyone joined to a prostitute is one body with her? For Scripture says, The two will become one flesh. But anyone joined to the Lord is one spirit with him. Flee sexual immorality! Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the person who is sexually immoral sins against his own body. Don’t you know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were brought at a price. So glorify God with your body. The world around our children do not value the things of God and the truth is not important to them. We are in a battle everyday as parents, single adults and youth, against everything we see and hear around us. Sex scenes in movies, pornography, television/music videos promoting sex before marriage and homosexuality. The images we see on commercials and social media glorify sex and the world does not see it as a sin. We must remember not to give into the desires of the flesh. We are the image of God and our bodies are his temple. We are in a constant battle, Spirit vs the Flesh. Galatians 5:19-21, Now the works of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, moral impurity, promiscuity, idolatry, sorcery, hatred, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambitions, dissensions, factions, envy, drunkenness, carousing and anything similar. When we become saved we become a new creature and we must put the sins of the flesh aside. Colossians 3:5, Therefore, put to death what belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desire and greed which is idolatry. Romans 6:12-14, Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body, so that you obey its desires. And do not offer any parts of it to sin as weapons for unrighteousness. But as those who are alive from the dead, offer yourselves to God and all the parts of yourselves to God as weapons of righteousness. For sin will not rule over you, because you are not under the law but under grace.  

Pre-marital sex causes a bond to form between couples. Science has shown that a bond forms mentally, emotionally and physically. The more times you have sexual relations with a person the stronger the bond becomes. Chemicals in our brains are released to form these bonds. In women it is oxytocin that relieves stress, creates calm and closeness which leads to increased trust. In men it is vasopressin which is released with intimate contact and works similar to oxytocin. There is also a release of endorphins during sex and this feeling can become addictive and most likely the reason un-married and adulterers/fornicators want to keep experiencing the rush over and over again. These hormones cause memories to form in the brain and these experiences are very difficult to forget. This was not God’s purpose but to be used in the sanctity of marriage. When these hormones are released with a couple who has not had any others, it can cause a strong bond and help navigate the hardships of life. I am totally guessing here but imagine if someone had multiple partners and these bonds kept forming and breaking. The bonds are so easily broken that when they finally get married, the first sign of trouble they go cheat or get divorced. The bond is weak and Satan has corrupted their mind. Satan wants us to form bonds with as many people as possible because this takes away our focus from God. Look at all the dating apps and how it promotes polyamory. Satan wants to weaken our focus on the relationship of marriage and your spouse. If you are remembering moments outside of your marriage from the past this can cause stress and the bond can be easily broken by desires outside of marriage. God has a purpose in everything he wants for us in our life. It is man and Satan that distorts his word and act upon their own fleshly desires. Knowing the truth can help save many before they become lost to the flesh.  

Adultery is voluntary sexual intercourse between a married person and a person who is not his or her spouse. Matthew 5:27-28, Do not commit adultery. But I tell you, everyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. Lust is a very strong sexual desire. In America and probably the entire world, sex sells. It is a marketing tool, from commercials, clothing lines, social media, celebrities, actors, sports icons, etc. that they will use to grab your attention. We see and hear it in music videos/radio, see it in commercials and television/movies. There is no filter on the internet or the world unless we have God in us. Access is unlimited and so many children and adults can get lost in a fantasy world. The world promotes adultery as if it is the new normal. Just watch a drama show on television and it seems everyone is in some type of sexual sin. Everyone loves gossip and look at how many famous people are married multiple times and caught in a scandal. There was a big scandal many years ago that married people could use a website to have sexual encounters outside of marriage. Adultery is not just limited to famous people but impacts regular families. When you flirt with that co-worker, or text secrets to someone else, when you go out with your friends and attempt to meet other people with lust, look at pornography, these are acts of adultery. Leviticus 18:20, You are not to have sexual intercourse with your neighbor’s wife, defiling yourself with her. The perception of adultery does not have the same significant negativity it did many years ago on this world. Even past Presidents who claim to be God fearing are caught in adultery. The world seems to accept it as a regular part of life. If your heart is filled with lust rather than the Word of God, then the devil will surely lead you into adultery. We must guard our hearts and realize even in marriage the devil will continue to attack us.  

Proverbs 5:1-14 (Avoid Seduction because in the end it will ruin you), My son, pay attention to my wisdom; listen closely to my understanding so that you may maintain discretion and your lips safeguard knowledge. Though the lips of the forbidden woman drip honey and her words are smoother than oil, in the end she’s as bitter as wormwood and as sharp as a double-edged sword. Her feet go down to death; her steps head straight for Sheol. She doesn’t consider the path of life; she doesn’t know that her ways are unstable. So now, sons, listen to me and don’t turn away from the words from my mouth. Keep your way far from her. Don’t go near the door of her house. Otherwise, you will give up your vitality to others and your years to someone cruel; strangers will drain your resources and your hard-earned pay will end up in a foreigner’s house. At the end of your life, you will lament when your physical body has been consumed and you will say, “How I hated discipline and how my heart despised correction. I didn’t obey my teachers or listen closely to my instructors. I am on the verge of complete ruin before the entire community.” This is coming from Solomon who was the wisest man alive and had multiple wives. Does this not sum up all the burdens we see, in people of the world go through when they give into the flesh and are consumed by sin? Just look at all the reality tv stars who try and fake happiness and please don’t believe the lies you see on social media of the perfect life. Sooner or later the truth comes out about their lives and you see how drained they are of life and happiness. Proverbs 5:20-23, Why, my son, would you lose yourself with a forbidden woman or embrace a wayward woman? For a man’s way are before the Lord’s eyes and he considers all his paths. A wicked man’s iniquities will trap him; he will become tangled in the ropes of his own sin. He will die because there is no discipline and be lost because of his great stupidity.  

There is no one reading this that probably does not know someone who is divorced or getting divorced. If the bond of marriage is not sanctified by Christ and if you do not love and make him your number one priority, marriage will be very tough. Not even money can save you, as the richest man in the world Bill Gates has announced he is getting divorced. Luke 16:18, Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery and everyone who marries a woman divorced from her husband commits adultery (Matt 19:9, Mark 10:11, Luke 16:18). The only reason someone can get a divorce, is in the case of sexual immorality (Matthew 5:32) or if the spouse dies (Romans 7:2-3). Not to say that even in the case of sexual immorality, if a person truly repents they can reconcile their marriage and can continue to build their relationship together in Christ (I Corinthians 7:10-11). Marriage is going to have ups and downs, just like in life. Pastors, self-help books and marriage counsellors all have their benefit. But if you are only using those as your resources and not reading, growing, praying, meditating from the Word of God then you may fail. The Holy Spirit is our Advocate, Comforter, Helper will teach us all these things and will remind us of what Jesus has spoken (John 14:26). We need the Holy Spirit in our lives daily to combat our flesh and Satan. Matthew 19:6, So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate. It is not something we can take lightly or something we can just move on from especially if children are involved. Satan is attacking the family structure and marriage itself. More homes now than ever are being raised by single parents after divorce, children being born out of wedlock is rising and divorce has become acceptable. The world’s view will always conflict with God’s commandments. Things may be socially accepted and popularized but we must know what the truth says and that begins with reading/mediating on his Word daily.  

Marriage is a special commitment, life-long and a bond that can never be broken. It has been created as a blessing and should be used together to grow our faith. God knew when he created Adam that he should not be alone. Genesis 2:18, Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper corresponding to him. You go from two and become one flesh and the journey is much easier when you are not alone. When one falls the other is there to pick them up. The bond only gets stronger as time grows and as your family grows. We are to walk in love and imitate Christ, and we can even in our marriage. Ephesians 5:1-3, Be ye therefore followers of God, as dear children; And walk in love, as Christ also hath loved us and hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweetsmelling savour. But fornication and all uncleanness, or covetousness, let it not be once named among you, as becometh saints. Proverbs 18:22, A man who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord. Proverbs 31:10, Who can find a wife of noble character? She is far more precious than jewels. Proverbs 19:14, A house and wealth are inherited from fathers, but a prudent (caring) wife is from the Lord. God wants us to enjoy marriage and we need to put down the phone, remove all the distractions and take the time to focus on God and our own relationship. Proverbs 5:18-19, Let your fountain be blessed and take pleasure in the wife of your youth. A loving deer, a graceful doe, let her breasts always satisfy you; be lost in her love forever. Don’t corrupt the blessing and the joy of marriage with sin.  

Marriage is similar to the Marriage that will happen between Christ and the Church. Ephesians 5:22-33, Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord, because the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of the body. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives are to submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her to make her holy, cleansing her with the washing of water by the word. He did this to present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or anything like that, but holy and blameless. In the same way, husbands are to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hates his own flesh but provides and cares for it, just as Christ does for the church, since we are members of his body. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two will become one flesh. This mystery is profound, but I am talking about Christ and the church. To sum up, each one of you is to love his wife as himself and the wife is to respect her husband. Rev 19:7-9, Let us be glad, rejoice and give him glory, because the marriage of the Lamb has come and his bride has prepared herself. She was given fine linen to wear, bright and pure. For the fine linen represents the righteous acts of the saints. Then he said to me, “Write: Blessed are those invited to the marriage feast of the Lamb!” Marriage and the holiness/purity has more meaning to it than just what it signifies on earth. We are to remain pure in marriage, we are made in his image and we are the body of Christ.  

The world will decide not to obey God and his commands and we know the result. Romans 1:22-32, Claiming to be wise, they became fools and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal man, birds, four-footed animals and reptiles. Therefore God delivered them over in the desires of their hearts to sexual impurity, so that their bodies were degraded among themselves. They exchanged the truth of God for a lie and worshipped and served what has been created instead of the Creator, who is praised forever. Amen. For this reason God delivered them over to disgraceful passions. Their woman exchanged natural sexual relations for unnatural ones. The men in the same way also left natural relations with women and were inflamed in their lust for one another. Men committed shameless acts with men and received in their own persons the appropriate penalty of their error. And because they did not think it worthwhile to acknowledge God, God delivered them over to a corrupt mind so that they do what is not right. They are filled with unrighteousness, evil, greed and wickedness. They are full of envy, murder, quarrels, deceit and malice. They are gossips, slanders, God-haters, arrogant, proud, boastful, inventors of evil, disobedient to parents, senseless, untrustworthy, unloving and unmerciful. Although they know God’s just sentence – they those who practice such things deserve to die – they now only do them, but even applaud others who practice them. This sums up all the sin we now see as acceptable and many attempting to re-write God’s commands. Rebellion is in their heart and they do now acknowledge or fear God.  

Even now, the world has deemed the month of June as “Pride Month” for the LGBT community. Isn’t it ironic that it was Lucifer’s pride that caused him to sin and be cast out of Heaven. Don’t let our flesh, lust and pride disobey God to please this world. James 4:6-7, God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble. Therefore, submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Marriage is sacred, blessing and a bond between a man and woman. Pre-marital sex/Fornication, homosexuality, adultery are all clearly defined as sin by God. As well as divorce except in two instances. It is very true as it says in I Corinthians 2:14-16, But the person without the spirit does not receive what comes from God’s spirit, because it is foolishness to him; he is not able to understand it since it is evaluated spiritually. The spiritual person, however, can evaluate everything and yet he himself cannot be evaluated by anyone. For who has known the Lord’s mind, that he may instruct him? But we have the mind of Christ. I think the phrase “Happy Wife, Happy Life” has really caused a rift or shifted the true focus in our marriages. What the phrase should be is, “Happy Christ, Happy Life.” When a man and woman are married they become one flesh. When that one flesh has put Christ as their most important priority, the problems of the world really don’t matter. The bond we have together with our spouse is to build an even stronger bond together with Christ!